Step up, step down, bend right, bend left

Originally posted on ag (but I've harboured these thoughts far too long to waste them on a mere reply which I'd never find again. They just seemed to pour out as I prepared to press "submit" on a one-liner reply, the story behind most of my blogs tbh). However, do excuse the unpolished language ;-)

lol i was so sure "dr. humayra abedin" pulled a stunt to obtain british citizenship earlier than the 5 year waiting period for her "highly skilled" visa would allow or sth. so that she could take a quick break to paris via eurostar without the hassle of a schengen visa. :P until she accused her parents of getting her admitted to a mental health hospital where she was "forced to take antipsychotic drugs and mood stabilisers that were wrongly prescribed". bullshit. yeah we've all heard the terrible lab aid stories and shit but i refuse to believe medicine practiced in bd is sooo fuc ked up. i can't think of anywhere else that would happen apart from bangla cinema. Either shey bhua kotha bolse interview te or we should all be aware of being prescribed the wrong medication that the doctor picked while he was blindfolded and recited "eenie meenie minie mo" next time either we ourselves or some close relative(s) or friend(s) are admitted to a bd hospital....

And bhua kotha bole thakle that was a terrible accusation by that selfish, selfish prat.

Shotto bole thakleo amar oke selfish prat bolar karon ase. She goes off to england to "study" and starts to live together with her "non-muslim" bf. Call me boring and old fashioned and uncool, but it's just that from that phrase (as reported by one of the news websites - i don't think it was bbc, might've been the guardian), I simply know the parents' side of the story is justified. Justified bolte ami boltesi na that her parents had the right to lie to take her back to bd and force her to marry this guy. I just mean that they as ordinary bangali parents, jara na jani koto jhamela koira meye re desher baire poraise, had a right to get pissed off.

Don't get me wrong, ami kintu forced marriage er pokkhe kisu bolinai.....even this faltu beti doesn't deserve to be married off to some faul guy she doesn't looooooove. But beti chalak hoile kayda koira jinishta handle korto. Baap ma ke mittha asshash/random bs story banay boila diya'i hoke, ar jei bhabei hoke. I thought daktars are clever/cunning/diplomatic(?!) enough to be able to keep their parents pleased as well as have an awesome helluva party all life long and not resort to teel ke taal kora and putting her country down before the eyes of the world. And I'll apologise and take it all back if somehow i ever find out that asholei she was telling the truth without an inch of exaggaration (rather than news reports or some autobiography which is surely due to be released sometime within the next five years - highly likely to be by the end of 2009 followed by a "lose weight with humayra abedin in 6 easy steps" DVD celebrating her 15 seconds of fame which tops being saved from some random miserable marriage by miiiiiilessss).

(okay fab ei kothagula amar pet er bhitor atkay chilo for the last god knows how many weeks, ever since the papers n shit were bombarded by her)..

on topic: ei apumonir kotha chinta korar age pls ei chhotto meyetake/meyegulare/onnanno chhotto bondhugulare bachao :)

http://www.unicef.de/foto/2007/english/index.htm

Goodnight.

Ken leeeee tuli budi boodouchuuuu

ferrero rocher is old and boring but i did love that fancy assortment box by ferrero that i guess can only be found in other places in europe apart from here cos i've never seen a single box in london stores. it contained two other types of chocolate apart from the hazelnutted bore, namely mon cheri, which was filled with liqueur and pocket coffee. Oh pocket coffee. I loved pocket coffee and miss it immensely from time to time, especially during late nights when i'm having my tea cos coffee would be too bitter and distract me from whatever piece of work it is that is keeping me up in the first place, and i need something a bit milder. and espresso encased within a piece of chocolate to neutralise the bitterness seems like the perfect little thing, perhaps created just to satiate the needs that are defined distinctly by those moments. they are amazing little creatures, those pocket coffees. i'm looking forward to stumbling upon them somewhere in london, sometime in the future. and when i'm rich and famous i wish to bathe in molten pocket coffee as an alternative to botox treatment. lol, just kidding.

i haven't tried any of those new ferreros nicely wrapped up in silver and brown instead of the traditional shiny golden foil. they're probs derivatives consisting of white choc/dark choc, or something along those lines, mere marketing schemes in order to step beyond the reputation of being monotonous that f.r. has so rightfully gained. although boring as hell, i must say they do look grand, a whole bunch of them, nicely wrapped up in their sophisticated style. the best layers are the 2nd and the 3rd, the biscuity one followed by the nice creamy bit. i absolutely detest hazelnuts, they shud be replaced with like, cashews, or something. lol. then we'd get boat-shaped chocs.

the layers, they have many a time reminded me of the geophysical structure of the earth consisting of four seperate layers. Come to think of it, the layers of f.r. very much resemble that of the earth. the crust is thin and .. uneven, followed by the mantle, which is ... okay fuck it, i learnt this shit roughly 10 years ago. oh, and the inner core of the earth is supposed to be molten and the outer core pretty solid, which i suppose was swapped around in ferreros. anyhoo. back to outer cores. yeah, so the outer core of f.r. is supposed to be molten. well, it doesn't actually appear to be molten as you make your way through the layers of the choc. but it melts in the mouth pretty smoothly. yumm. imagine replacing that with some nice and creamy original lindt. that would surely drive anyone crazy.

anyhoo, i've exhausted myself now. you can't really fulfill your chocoholic desires by brooding about chocolate.

btw, i disagree with people who think it's haraam to eat mon cheri.

Shohoj Manush

Bhabtesilam, "Morile Shob Hobey Mati"....... heheh......literally!!

kaisi yeh bhalaaaai

It's always weird to have peyaju during non-roja times...

Superpowers

I have lost my ability to sing. Well, I was never great in the first place, but atleast I could pick up tunes, somewhat reach low/high pitch. Now all that comes out is a squeal, like a violin being played by someone who has never touched one before. It's in a terrible state now, I can't even sing along to songs that are playing on winamp anymore.

And it's so frustrating. SO frustrating. To have had something, a special attribute such as that - no matter how minor or huge it is - and then to have lost it. It's especially difficult to deal with when you used it on a regular basis, it was part of you and it gave you that little bit of an edge that makes you a different person from everyone else or you may have used it to attain inner peace, or a means of "release". Now I know why my mom gets upset about the fact that as she is getting older, she is starting to look slightly matured. Because you had it, it was yours, it was there in your grasp but you had to let go. And now it's gone and you can never use it. You never know the power of your beauty until it expires. And in my case, it's my my ability to sing.

---

O Mistress mine, where are you roaming?
O, stay and hear; your true love's coming,
That can sing both high and low:
Trip no further, pretty sweeting;
Journeys end in lovers meeting,
Every wise man's son doth know.

What is love? 'Tis not hereafter;
Present mirth hath present laughter;
What's to come is still unsure:
In delay there lies not plenty;
Then, come kiss me, sweet and twenty,
Youth's a stuff will not endure.

- William Shakespeare

Hi! My name is...

I always start blogs, but I can never keep up with them. And then three years later, when one day I feel like blogging again and return to my previous blog (the last one left unfinished), and it looks like something I shouldn't tamper with and I just don't feel like writing on it anymore. Just because it was written at a different period of time, when I was living within a different mindset and it's turned into something I can only relate to now, but cannot go back to being that me. If that makes sense.

Yeah, I know, people go through changes continually, and yet write in the same blog for years and don't feel like they are messing up the portrayal of their previous self by infiltrating their blog with entries from their newer self but in their case it is a continuous process. Whereas if you stop for a while which ends up being a "gap year" or whatever, you've moved on when the blog hasn't, and why the hell would you feel like getting it up to date? I mean, I guess you could, but that would mean you are recollecting memories from a year, or six months back and it's just not...the same as coming back in the evening with musings you've had throughout the day and you mix them up together and come up with a more personal piece of writing which is the key difference between the two.

Having said that, I did use my LJ three years in a row. But every time I restarted after being away for a while, I'd always erase all the previous entries and start afresh (well, I saved them in a doc but I later forgot the password to it). But it always remained something I could go back to (well, until I added people from Woodford County on it, and then they took me off the list which got me bitter and my beloved blog "tainted").

There's always two things that do not change in any of my blogs. Constant apology/"wondering" if what I just wrote made any sense (when it clearly should be "knowing". I am still confused as to whether this falls under criticising my own self or assuming my readers are dumb). And the other thing is my constant referral to my LJ. crazy_punkchild (That's another reason for me dumping LJ. (I can hear paku sniggering in my head.)). Twas like first love between LJ and I. It opened up doors and windows (and bin lids) in my mind. So, my relationship with any other blog will never be the same.

I have changed so much in the last few years. Especially so, in the last ... bleh. Just thought that it's worth mentioning.